This is what Adoption looks like: The Beginning
Our adoption story begins when I was just five years old. I saw my first African American cabbage patch kid and I thought she was the most beautiful doll I had ever seen. I pleaded to have a baby like this one but I was politely told “little white girls have white babies”. I began telling others when I grow up I will have dark babies. I was going to adopt. I’m not sure where the word even came from but I knew this is what I would do and that my children would look like this beautiful doll. It was more than wishful thinking it was a deep longing. This longing continued to grow and by 9th grade I knew it was more than wishful thinking but a dream God was placing deep in my heart. I began to imagine what a family filled with different ethnicities could look like. A beautiful picture of what it looks like in God’s family. Each different and unique. From the time we started dating Darin and I spoke of adoption being a special way to grow a family beyond having biological children. Our first Christmas after we were engaged Darin gave me a very special gift. Two cabbage patch dolls. They were the symbols of our future together. To bring home the children God promised to a 5 year old girl.
One year later we were married. Fast forward through a house, 4 kids and a growing ministry- life just seemed to be going by with yearly conversations of “when should we fit adoption into this equation”? We originally thought when Toby (child #4) became 5 years old we would make the leap to start the long process. But as life sometimes does- a small curve ball happened. Our ministry purchased our current property. No big deal right? Except the house we were suppose to live in had massive mold issues and our family moved into the one room cabin, hence this blog name. (You can watch a short video here if you want to know more: House Tour .) No body in their right mind would give another child to a family of 6 and a large golden retriever who are living in 432 square feet. It was hard to continue to wait for this life long dream but the reality proved it was not yet time. Honestly I think we just weren’t ready either. The extra time helped us continue to work towards becoming debt free (we used the Dave Ramsey total money makeover and honestly it changed our lives). We knew there would be huge costs involved with adoption (unless we are able to find our children through the foster care system) and though we planned on fundraising we also knew there would be additional fees a long the way and a good chance we would not raise all the needed funding to bring our children home. Finally after a series of miracles including God providing a new 3 bedroom house through the generous donation of a dear ministry partner, and that same donor wanting to add on an addition of a garage and more bedrooms, we knew it was time. Darin had just turned 40 and we were aware within just a few years we would no longer be good candidates for certain adoptions due to our ages. Knowing we very much wanted to adopt children of minority we were preparing for the possibility of two separate adoptions. It would be a dream come true to adopt biological siblings but the chances were also slim and it was important to us that our children have someone who looks like them in our family. This meant the more time we waited the closer the two adoptions would have to be to each other. The day after we decided it was time to pursue the next steps I was added on Facebook by the very woman I had planned on contacting to use as our Agency. To some this “coincidence” may not seem like a big deal we really weren’t connected in any way. For us it was confirmation that the time was right and a nice open door for communication to set up our first meeting!